As a mom or dad preparing to start divorce mediation in New Jersey, your children are most likely your number one concern.
And they should be.
You love your kids and want the world for them.
So now that you're getting a divorce, how do you make sure they get the financial support they need in order to live healthy and happy lives?
That’s where NJ child support comes in.
Child support is one of four topics that are discussed and agreed upon in mediation along with:
The purpose of child support is to ensure that the financial needs of your children are being met by you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse.
Many parents think the purpose of child support is to make sure they have enough money after they’re divorced to pay for the items their kids need.
But that’s only partially correct.
Divorce is hard on your children. The fighting and the stress you’re going through can really take a toll on them.
Soon you will no longer be husband and wife, but you’ll always be mom and dad.
When it comes to New Jersey child support, it is pretty clear that you and your spouse must remain as responsible for your children financially after you're divorced as you were while you were married.
"Most parents think the child support guidelines output a specific dollar amount and that’s that. But the reality is the guidelines are just a starting point for negotiations.
Plus there are a lot of expenses not covered by the basic child support amount.
That's why the best way to come to a fair agreement and ensure your children get the financial support they need is to work with an experienced mediator like me."
- Divorce Mediator Joe Dillon
Federal law requires all 50 states to have a mechanized way by which to determine child support. So every state has a child support guideline and the formulas vary from state to state.
Some states use a simple percentage-based formula. You’d simply take a share of the supporting party’s income and give it to the other party and you’re done.
But not in New Jersey.
NJ uses something called the Income Shares Model.
The income shares model attempts to take into account a number of factors including:
There are also a number of other factors that may be applied.
From there, the NJ child support guideline will attempt to approximate the minimum amount of financial support needed to raise your children in the State of New Jersey.
Notice I didn't say "formula," I said guideline. And I didn’t say that the guidelines provide an "adequate" or "reasonable" amount of child support.
I simply said minimum.
Don’t forget, this guideline was developed by the State of New Jersey. But the State of NJ doesn’t know the exact amount required to ensure your kids are properly supported so they’ll thrive.
Only you know what it really costs to raise your kids!
So while you might think you simply run the guideline and use the number calculated, it’s not even close. The reality is, the number isn’t a hard and fast formula, but rather, a suggestion.
And it’s just a starting point for negotiation.
From there, it’s up to you and your spouse to negotiate an agreement that’s in the best interests of your children and that you both find fair.
Which is not so easy to do.
Especially given the cost of living in towns like Montclair and Morristown!
So far, you've learned the child support NJ guidelines attempt to provide divorcing parents with an estimate of the minimum amount of financial support needed to raise their children.
And then it allocates a portion of that amount to each of you based on a number of factors.
The NJ child support guidelines factor in the following costs, among others:
The State of NJ regards these as the “ordinary expenses” incurred while raising a child.
But as a parent, you know there’s so much more involved than just feeding your kids and putting a roof over their heads!
There’s also:
All of these are known as "extraordinary" expenses and are not included in the basic child support amount.
These items must be discussed and negotiated separately to ensure your children get the financial support they need and deserve.
In addition to the ordinary and extraordinary costs associated with having a child, you and your spouse will also need to discuss and come to an agreement on:
Making the list of what is not resolved by running the guidelines longer and longer.
In order for the NJ child support guideline to be applied as-is, your income and your spouse’s income must be predictable from month-to-month and year-to-year.
So if one or both of you earn more of your compensation from bonuses, commissions, or stock options, the guidelines simply won’t work.
Meaning if you and your spouse collectively earn more than a set amount per year, the guidelines also won’t work.
Another example of why it’s called a child support guideline and not a formula.
In either case, you’ll have no choice but to skip the guidelines and negotiate instead.
Which is not always so easy to do.
A few years back, the Governor of NJ signed a bill into law that establishes 19 as the age when a parent's child support and/or medical support obligation will end.
So child support ends at age 19. Right?
Well... maybe...
The truth is there can be exceptions agreed upon by you and your spouse.
As parents, the two of you have quite a bit of latitude to decide what works for your children, in your unique situation.
So while child support can end at age 19, more often than not, it doesn't.
Sounds scary, doesn’t it?
That’s why it’s better to negotiate this issue out of court and that’s exactly what mediation is all about.
In mediation, you get to decide - and come to an agreement that's in the best interest of your children and you both agree is fair, instead of letting your future be decided by a stranger.
And as you’ve learned, there is more than meets the eye on this topic. So don't risk putting your children's financial future in jeopardy by trying to resolve child support on your own.
Use divorce mediation and work with us instead!
One that covers all ordinary, extraordinary, and future expenses.
Because no two situations are alike.
Your children are unique and your child support agreement should reflect that, too.
Early in the process?
The choices you make before you start your divorce are critical.
But you can only make smart choices if you take the time to prepare first!
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