Divorce Coach Cheryl Dillon earned a Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from the University of Connecticut and is a Certified Life Coach. She completed formal training at The Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) – an internationally recognized leader in the field of coaching education.
Cheryl has helped countless men and women survive and thrive before, during and after divorce.
Through her 1-on-1 private divorce coaching program for mediation clients, speaking engagements, educational eBooks and articles published in the Huffington Post, Midlife Boulevard, Divorce HQ and on Equitable Mediation’s blog, Cheryl is more than a sympathetic ear, she’s a divorce expert.
The coaching process with Cheryl has been an integral part of balancing my emotions and the practical matters of my divorce.
Cheryl's guidance and ability to provoke ideas on how to manage situations has been truly a blessing and a way to reduce my anxiety, cope with emotions and help me surface my true feelings and fears.
Having a coach is a resource I never knew could be so valuable and I am grateful for Cheryl's capacity to listen, reflect and guide me through solving challenges.
Having gone through my own painful divorce in 2002, I know first-hand the turmoil and negative impact ending a marriage has on a person’s health, life and emotional well-being.
And while making the decision to divorce was hard enough, I knew I still had a long road ahead. I had to actually figure out how to get through the process!
Given that my world was already upside down, I didn’t want things to become any more traumatic. And everything I’d heard about involving lawyers in a divorce led me to believe things would go from bad to worse.
By using mediation instead of family law attorneys, I was able to attain the logistical and financial guidance needed to complete our divorce negotiations.
And my now ex-husband and I saved a lot of time, money and stress and reached an agreement we both found fair.
Doing my best to put on a brave face at my Grandma's 80th birthday party. This picture was taken just three hours after my now ex and I made the decision to divorce. My family didn't know yet and I didn't want to tell them and ruin Grandma's special day.
I was hurt, angry, frightened of an uncertain future and I felt utterly powerless and alone.
But I knew I didn’t want to stay stuck in the past - I wanted to be happy. So I saw a mental health professional, read books, meditated, leaned on friends and family and did whatever I could to help myself cope with divorce and move forward. And I made a very conscious choice to learn from this painful experience and use it to improve the quality of my life.
All of those things helped along the way but there was still something missing. So my personal development journey continued and in 2011, I found life coaching.
I learned how to make better choices. How to turn a problem into an opportunity. I learned that while I can’t control other people or outside events, I can change the way I react to those external circumstances.
I learned how to let go of my anger. And recognized that I am the only one in charge of my own happiness. I then learned how to create the life I wanted.
It was at that moment I realized coaching would have accelerated my own divorce recovery all those years ago.
In 2011, I decided to combine my own experience with divorce, my formal training as a life coach and my more than 20 years of professional experience in human relations to add divorce coaching and emotional support to Equitable Mediation’s services.
Divorce coaching sessions are voluntary and available to you and your spouse individually or together throughout the mediation process.
Why did I believe it was critical to offer divorce coaching sessions to all of our mediation clients?
You might think divorce is all about laws, money and paperwork.
While there’s no doubt that the process itself focuses on the legal, financial and operational aspects of divorce, there’s another aspect equally, if not more important.
And it’s the one that can get individuals and couples in the most trouble.
Emotions are what determine how long the divorce process will take, what it will cost and how stressful it will be for you and your children.
Emotions drive the decisions you’ll make - critical decisions that will impact you and your children for years to come.
Emotions determine how you’ll fare in your divorce settlement. And even the happiness you will or won’t have in your life and future relationships after your divorce is over.
That’s why it’s so important to learn how to effectively manage anger, resentment and other toxic emotions during and after the divorce process. Otherwise, you’ll wind up paying a high price for them - now and quite possibly for the rest of your life.
Dealing with divorce emotions is easier with the help of a coach.
Cheryl has a real passion for helping men and women impacted by divorce.
Her intuitive questions, active listening skills and ability to connect with people enable her clients to effectively cope with this painful life event and create action plans to move forward into a brighter future.
Hi Cheryl! I’m going to guess you don’t get a lot of emails from past clients, so I hope you remember me, and don’t find this too weird! You have been on my mind lately, and I thought I would reach out to let you know how much I have continued to appreciate the support, wisdom and guidance you offered during the divorce process.
Life has moved apace, and I continue to remember things you said during coaching that seemed so far-fetched at the time but now seem almost prescient in their accuracy. "S" and I have each moved on in very positive ways, and are working together well to support the kids and finish up the divorce process.
I thought you might appreciate this funny story. You may not remember saying this, but it stuck in my head and came back to me recently. I think we were discussing how at some point all of this would be behind us, and the possibilities for good, new things would open up. You said something along the lines of "Who knows, maybe next year you will be sitting on an airplane and meet the love of your life.” Well, over the summer I had reached a place where I was open to the possibility of dating/meeting someone. I was on my way back from Europe (I took a little trip all by myself, and it was AWESOME), and while I was sitting at the bar in the first class lounge, this lovely gentleman sat down next to me! We had so much fun for four hours before our flights.
I literally was thinking to myself at the time, "If only Cheryl could see this!" Now, I wish I could say that he is the new love of my life, so that you could take credit for predicting it! He’s not, and honestly, I doubt I will see him again, even though we are still in touch. However, three days later, I had a date with someone else, and he just might be. And if he isn’t, he’s perfect for me right now, which is just as good.
I guess what I am trying to say is thank you, and to encourage you to please keep doing what you are doing. It helps, and I haven’t forgotten. I hope you are well.
Going through the process of divorce is one of the most emotionally stressful situations you can ever face. But what I also want you to know is that how you move through - and eventually beyond your divorce is your choice.
And just because your marriage is ending doesn’t mean your life has to. You deserve to be happy!
So be smart.
Don’t hire lawyers and use the divorce process to retaliate against your spouse. It will only hurt both of you and your children – emotionally and financially.
Instead, let Joe and I help you peacefully end your marriage.
All without involving divorce attorneys. And without destroying your mental health, life and emotional well-being.
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