If you’re looking to get an out of state divorce, you might think your only choice is to hire divorce attorneys for the process.

Even though you'd rather use divorce mediation instead.

If you're like many divorcing couples, you might think that in order to use mediation, you and your spouse need to be in the same state at the same time. So you can sit face-to-face and work out the terms of your settlement agreement in the mediator's office.

And because of that, out of state divorces using mediation are just not possible.

Or are they?

The Best Way to Get a Divorce When Living in Different States

online-divorce-mediation-Equitable-MediationOnline divorce mediation is perfect for couples seeking no fault, interstate uncontested divorces. Both parties (you and your spouse) will still work with your mediator in real-time to identify, discuss, negotiate and resolve all of the issues required for your divorce. The same way you would in a traditional, face-to-face mediation process.

These issues include, but are not limited to:

  • Alimony (spousal support, maintenance, spousal maintenance)
  • Division of marital property, division of assets and liabilities (equitable distribution or community property - depending on the state you live in)
  • If you have children, a parenting plan (parenting time, child custody) and child support

But instead of having to travel to the mediator's office and meet face-to-face, you will simply negotiate remotely via telephone and internet meeting (screen sharing) software.

By leveraging technology and the expertise of our neutral third party highly skilled divorce mediator, you and your spouse can get through the divorce process and end your marriage peacefully, fairly, cost-effectively, conveniently and out of court.

No matter where you live.

This type of mediation process is ideal for divorcing out of state and completing the steps to divorce across state lines.

You'll get a higher quality and more thorough agreement than you would with a do-it-yourself divorce. And divorce lawyers are not required (unless you choose to involve them).


In Out of State Divorces, What are The Benefits of Using Divorce Mediation?

Here are some of the benefits of using divorce mediation for your interstate divorce:

  • Your divorce will be fair and equitable because you'll both get to fully control the process and terms of your settlement agreement.

    In mediation, agreements must be reached and agreed to by you and your spouse. And your agreement won't be final until both of you say it is.

  • Your divorce will be cost-effective.

    An divorce lawyer's initial retainer costs between $3,500 and $10,000 per person. And you know the retainer is just the beginning of what the two of you will really wind up spending on your divorce.

    Attorney fees for a standard Lawyer-Driven Divorce can range from $20,000 to $32,000. Costs for a divorce that goes to trial vary, but can range from $78,000 to $200,000 per couple.

    On the other hand, the average cost of divorce mediation ranges between $7,000 and $10,000.

    So you can save thousands on your divorce by choosing to mediate your uncontested divorce case instead of involving family law divorce attorneys.

  • Your divorce will be more peaceful and better for your kids.

    We've all heard the horror stories about kids being used as pawns and put in the middle of their parents' divorce.

    But in the mediation process, you and your spouse work together as parents instead of against each other as litigants and make decisions that are in your child's best interests when it comes to child support and parenting time.

    And that will really set you up for success as co-parents once your divorce decree is issued and the divorce process is over.

  • Your negotiations will be confidential.

    Divorce litigation using family law attorneys is a matter of public record. So anyone can watch your divorce proceedings and know everything that goes on including the exact terms of your settlement agreement and divorce decree.

    But in mediation, everything will be discussed in private and out of court. And the process and terms of your interstate divorce and settlement agreement will be confidential.

    Which is exactly the way it should be.

And there are many other benefits of divorce mediation as well as some specific to online divorce mediation.


Does Online Mediation Really Work for an Out of State Divorce?

divorce-mediation-online-Equitable-MediationYes! Our Mediation-On-The-Go™ online divorce mediation works so well that many of our clients choose to mediate this way even when they both live in the same state and we have a mediation location near them.

Out of state divorce mediation can be completed in the same amount of time as face-to-face mediation with no differences in the quality, effectiveness of the process or results.

Couples using our innovative and extremely popular online mediation format even for an intrastate divorce report the same level of satisfaction as our clients who chose to mediate their no-fault divorce in-person.

We've even helped couples when one party lived in a different country!


Is Divorce Mediation Right for Your Multi State Divorce?

When seeking a multi state divorce, the best candidates for working with us using this type of mediation to end their marriage are couples in which:

  • At least one spouse (the filing spouse) meets the residency requirement of the home state.

    If at least one party (the filing spouse) lives in California, Illinois, New Jersey, New York, Pennsylvania, Washington State, Michigan, or Wisconsin, and meets the residency requirement or requirements for that state, you can mediate your interstate divorce with us.

  • Both parties want to mediate and are willing to actively participate in the mediation process.

    If only one of you wants to end your marriage and use mediation but the other doesn't, mediation won't be a viable option for your out of state divorce.

  • Both spouses want to make his/her own decisions and are comfortable doing so.

    The divorce mediator will educate you, help you identify and negotiate the issues and bring options to the table, but he won't give you any legal advice or tell you what to do.

    You and your spouse will be in full control of the decisions you make and terms of your agreement.

  • Both spouses are mentally capable of making their own decisions.

    You both must be of sound mind. If either of you is mentally incapacitated in any way, you won't be able to mediate.

Equitable Mediation Makes Out of State Divorces Easier

Divorce is already difficult and divorce living in different states doesn’t make it any less stressful.

Until now.

If you or your spouse both want to mediate (or complete your interstate divorce without lawyers), why not learn more about the benefits of working with us before you file divorce papers?

Then, book an initial meeting for the two of you to get started!


Early in the process?

Get our Free eBook to learn about the benefits of mediating your divorce.

Before you go out and hire divorce lawyers, learn why you owe it to yourself to mediate instead.

10 Compelling Reasons to Mediate. Get the Free eBook!


Other Useful Resources:


Joe Dillon, Divorce Mediator

Written by Joe Dillon, Divorce Mediator

Joe Dillon, MBA is a professional divorce mediator and founder of Equitable Mediation Services. Joe is passionate about helping couples avoid the destruction of attorney-driven litigation and specializes in helping couples resolve the issues required for divorce -peacefully, fairly and cost-effectively. When he’s not mediating, you can find him exercising, cooking, and watching Cubs baseball.